Living with a twist of Lyme

     I have had health problems for most of my life but never knew what was causing them.  Had migraines and low energy among other things since I was around 7 years old.  I always just thought I was a sickly child and wondered what was wrong with me.  I am a pastor's daughter which added to everything in that you always have that feeling of "living in a glass house".  I learned quickly to buck up and put on a front that everything was fine when it was far from the truth.  I trudged through my childhood with my parents helping as best as they could with the resources they had.  My health took a worse turn after the birth of my first child.  I developed pain through out my whole body.  Pain that would not go away and only worsened on some days or lessened on others but was always present.  I also ended up with a herniated disc in my lower back all from just standing while holding my then three month old baby.  I continued to try to push on but finally went in search of answers after my third child was born and just could not take the pain and exhaustion anymore.  It was affecting my daily life.  After many doctors and tests, I was finally diagnosed with Fibromyalgia.  It was such a relief to have a reason as to why I was in extreme pain and having extreme exhaustion.  I trudged on trying nutritional and other medications to help relieve my pain and exhaustion.  It helped in some ways to at least get through the days a little better.
     Fast forward 8 years later.  Every treatment that I have tried for Fibromyalgia has not helped.  We start to look into my being misdiagnosed.  My mom had mentioned a couple times about possibly testing for Lyme disease.  Never thought much of it until I started getting even worse.  I went and did some research on Lyme disease and so many unanswered health problems would be answered if I had Lyme disease.  We decided to take the plunge and get me tested.  Now you would think "Oh that should be easy" but it was far from the truth.  It is hard to find a Dr that will treat you ,none the less actually test you for it.  Because of the way typical treatment is done (very high doses of antibiotics for a long time), there were issues with some Drs losing their licenses.  So Doctors basically do not want to touch Lyme disease with a ten foot pole.
     Praise God, we found a Dr only 40 mins from where we live that treats Lyme disease.  I made an appointment as quickly as possible and got in to see him.  He was not convinced I had Lyme disease and thought more than likely I was dealing with a thyroid problem.  He agreed to test though.  In the end, my thyroid is text book perfect and I was positive for Lyme disease.  Boy was he shocked.  Just goes to show that you know your own body better than any Dr does!
     We opted to try Ozone therapy weekly.  Ozone therapy is where they take some of your blood out, oxygenate it then put it back in.  It kills any Lyme in it and super charges the blood.  Man do the treatments get me down though because when the Lyme is killed it releases toxins into the body thus giving your body toxic shock.  It is going to be a long struggle till to battle this disease.  Lyme multiples very quickly and can hide in your body.  It can attack in and every organ in your body.  I am so blessed that as fas I as I know, it has not attacked my heart.  God's grace has been shown so clearly to me that even though I have lived with this disease for at least 28 years with out knowing it, I am alive.  Yes, it has not been easy and the pain and exhaustion that I live with daily is very hard but I still am blessed with my life, family, friends and church.
     I am the greatest pretender when it comes to how I am feeling.  I live with a disease that affects my daily life but I cover it up. I try to always put on a smile and it is hard for me to open up and show how I am truly feeling.  I never like to be seen as a complainer.  Even when my husband or friends, whom love me dearly, want to truly know how I am feeling, I find myself answering with out thinking, "Fine".  I am not trying to deceive anyone but it is hard to have a disease in which I look perfectly healthy.  No one can understand the amount of pain my body has daily or the extreme exhaustion among many other problems unless they themselves live with the same thing.  It is hard to explain to someone that every movement you make hurts (some days more than others) and because of that pain and exhaustion you end up sitting a lot.  My hardest struggle is to not feel like I am being lazy since I cannot just push and go, go, go like so many other ladies.
     Through it all, God has been there carrying me through the bad days, extremely bad days and the days that are actually decent.